hati ku berbunge-bunge..
huhu~
dem, that kid is so sweet.. menjadikan aku sangat sukee..
ok beb, kalo ade org layan ko baik, buat muke sweet.. n sweet2 ngan ko, tidakkah ko gak akan berase suke n gumbira.. of coz laa kan..
so do i..
but it's kinda complicated..
am i cheating to hunky? aku rase cam tak.. tapi perasaan suke dekat that kid membuatkan aku rase guilty kat hunky sumtimes..
seriously, talk to him, n seeing him membuatkan aku rase cam hepi2 n syok sdiri..
hehahahahaa..
anyway..
adakah patut aku berase bersalah?
patut kah..?
mungkin yea, mungkin tidak..

well, i shud feel guilty..
coz am going nuts if he feel the same way towards other gal besides me..

n i shud not feel guilty..
coz lately.. hunky is so grumpy n treat me bad.. not that bad actually..
but he treat me not as nice as that kid.
is not that am trying story the ugliness of my marriage life..
but..

ok..
here the situation..
i luv my hunky. so do him. but i know the spark of our luv ain't sparkling enuf like before. he spend more time wif his guy fren instead of me n my son. last weekn, bleh tak die pegi main futsal til midnite, then balik pastuh kuar balik pegi lepak ngan kawan2 die.. n do u have any idea where he has been? sumwer at Damansara playing online game at cyber cafe till subuh. bengang tak? of coz aku bengang gile! but aku dah letih dah, berbuih dah mulut aku ni bising2 kat die. tapi buang air liur n buang mase aku jek. n since weekn.. everynite he's leaving office, the first place he's heading to, is kedai mamak, n last nite, aku tak tau kul brape dah die balik umah.. pegi mane?
pegi danau kota ngan kekawan sampai due buah keter.. kul brape balik, yang pasti nyer after 1 am, coz 1 pagi aku tgh sebok dok mlayan my son lagi..
Arghhh!!! bengang nyer aku..
sabar..sabar..
n babe,
i've got this free vouchers, 3 days 2 nites stay at swiss garden that will be expired
on june.. of coz i ask hunky to go on holiday wif me using that voucher. n guess what. die tanak pegi! bleh tak! dah laa bende tuh free. macam haram. aku siap cakap lagi, tanak pegi, aku pegi sorang je ar, tinggal aiman ngan die, n can u guess his answer..?
"ok pegilaa.. ok jek kalo aiman stay wif me.. i dun mind.."
wtf!!!!?
paham tak camner aku nyer feeling skarang..
geram tak?! bukan stakat geram..
it's hurt ok..
it's goddem hurt my feeling..
tapi aku buat bodoh jelaa..
aku dah letih sbenarnye..
tired in trying to fix thing.. things between us..
i know, there's still love..
but love alone is not enuf..
huuumm.....

and that's the reason why i luv so much when that kid is around..
i luv his companion..
i luv he's trying to make an effort to please me..
being sweet towards me..
coz i really need that badly.. even jez for a short moment..
i feel good bout myself.. n the tension of the relationship and all the hustle in my mind has gone for awhile..
it's ok, tho jez for a few minutes in my life..
i really treasure the feelgood feeling, coz not everyday n every moment u will feel good bout urself..
thanx for that kid..